Lessons at 50

Oct 19, 2016

50 used to be old. At least, it was when I was 20, 30, 40. However, the closer I got to it, the younger and friendlier it has become.

Before you stop reading because you are expecting me to tell you how it's all downhill from here, I'm not going to do that. I heard that at 40 and I've been hearing that about 50 and now, I'm sure, I'll hear that about 60. That's fine. You are entitled to your opinion. Since this is my blog, I'm going to give you my opinion. You can agree or disagree - I don't really care, to be quite honest. (Definitely a perk of crossing over into my 50s!).

Since I have turned 40, I have cared less and less with each passing year about what most other people think. Why? Because I have learned that people are going to believe what they want to believe and very little of it has to do with me.

Ok, before this turns all, I am woman, I am 50 and just don't care anymore, let me turn this around because that is not at all where I want to go with this!

I do feel that I have learned some things along the way that have held true and been painfully clear, at times. Life boils down to some very simple truths and in a world that is much more gray than we care to admit, simple truths can help clear away the fog, helping us find the crystal clear reality. Here it is, an incomplete list of important truths that I have been told and have lived long enough to truly experience:

1. You've got to have friends. Choose them wisely and then invest heavily. Friends are the people in your life who will tell you the truth. They will tell you to your face what they will say when you leave the room. They will lift you up, not tear you down. They will help you be the best that you can be. They will see your faults and your strengths and love you through all of it. To have a friend, you must be a friend.
2. Friends are wonderful, but family is truly forever. Our heritage is something we cannot deny. Our family plays an important role in who we are - for good or ill, they have a profound influence on who we are and who we become. When we understand where we come from, we will have an easier time getting where we're going.
3. No matter what you're going through, time keeps marching, life goes on and nothing is ever the same as it was yesterday. This is a good thing. Don't wish time away, spend it. It is going to pass. You can't stop it, so savor it.
4. There will be things about today that you wish were different. Take note and change them. As stuck as you might feel, you're not. You have the power to change, just do it. Get up and do it. Remember, time keeps on marching.
5. Parenthood is the best investment of my time. Ever. It is the hardest job in the world. By far. The day I became a parent, my heart started walking around outside of me. It has been divided up into multiple pieces that seem to keep multiplying - first with my 3 daughters, again with the addition of a son-in-law and soon, with the arrival of my first grandbaby. It just keeps getting better and better.
6. When you choose a partner for life, choose a good one. This one, I got right, for sure. We have a shared vision for life and always have. He is my friend and I LIKE him. My love and respect for him grow with each passing year. Don't take marriage lightly. Challenge yourself to grow together and take your commitment seriously.
7. Being kind doesn't mean you are weak. Never hold back a smile, an encouraging word or a kind gesture. Kind people are strong people.
8. Hurting people hurt people. When someone hurts you, they are hurting. When we seek to understand someone, we help to soothe that hurt and heal that wound. It is important to attempt to understand someone else's perspective.
9. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Don't assume that someone can understand what you are trying to say or what you really mean. Eliminate the confusion and say what you mean. You can say it without being rude or cruel. It is never ok to be rude. There is no good reason for being rude.
10. All you really have is your word. You will be known by the words you choose. Be careful. Choose wisely. Think before you speak. Words are powerful. Make yours count.

This list is not exhaustive of all the lessons I have learned. It's just a starter. These are some of the basic truths that I find myself coming back to again and again. I thought if I shared it, someone might find it helpful. I hope that is the case.

On this, my 50th birthday, I am thankful for these lessons of life and for life itself AND for these awesome gifts in the picture above, sent to me by my awesome hubs!

I want to encourage you to invest in yourself by always working to use the gifts, talents and strengths you've been given, to be your best and live intentionally.

Gotta run,  

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